Exposed

I thought I would share the thoughts that I wrote down in my journal today.

Proverbs 28:13

He who conceals his sins does not prosper,

but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy.

We are all walking wounded.  Some of us project it onto everyone else around us expecting them to be responsible for healing our wounds.  Some of us withhold ourselves from others in an effort to never be wounded again.  And some of us are those rare beautifully, wounded people who expose their wounds and allow others to see not only the wound but the Great Healer at work in them.

I yearn to be that person who humbly confesses my wounds and deals with them.  Who authentically allows others to see my scars, weaknesses, infirmities and festuring sores without regard to self.  With regard alone for my Father and for love of others.

I think my intention is right but my flesh is weak.  I find myself responding to situations with little ability to express this deeper motive.  Often I find that my own selfishness betrays my true heart and my love cannot be seen.  When I deal in relationship with another I see that so many times what I thought was love is not and true love often contains tremendous sacrifice and pain.

I'm reminded of how Jesus was completely exposed on the cross.  Of how his most loving act was his greatest pain.  What am I to gain from this knowledge?  That I too will pain stakingly sacrifice and be exposed?  If I am to truly live for him this is my lot, if not here, in the next life I will be exposed.

For Jesus his exposure was that of the fulfillment of prophesy, of great hope and truth.  For me as I carry my own cross the exposure is that of great sin  and shame.  The truth still remains in this and all things, I do not carry that cross alone.  I do not labor to rid myself of that terrible sin and shame.  I do not turn the other cheek of my own strength.  All of these are only done through him that lives in me.

I prayed today that the Father would help me to see accurately.  My selfishness and pride prevent me from really seeing.  I asked that God would remove the fog and help me to see in clarity as far as he wills me to see.  If I am in the way I prayed he would break down that selfishness and replace it with a heart that is completely surrendered to him.

I don't know what this life is suppose to look like.  I often find that I have these moments of almost being able to see and grasp just a bit of the enormity of my hidden life in the Lord.  Then in an instant I am back in the flesh battling again to get a glimpse.  Praise be that I do not have to struggle and fight alone, the way is already paved and bought.  I simply must choose to follow it no matter how hard and narrow.

What's Your Reference Point?

I love small phrases that remind me of big things.  When I am in a trying moment I am most helped by a few key words that can remind me of the truth.  A new phrase I am adding to my arsenal of wordy helpers is, what's your reference point?  Too many times I get caught up in an issue and I forget what the reference point is.  The reference point is the heart of an issue, the truth of the matter, the center of something. Take this morning when one of my children spilled blueberry smoothie on the floor my reference point should have been to point to the Lord's will in this and all things.  Yet, I was tempted to have my reference point be my emotions.  They were along the lines of, great now I have a giant mess to clean up, wasn't this child suppose to be sitting!!!  But, if I stop and say what's my reference point I am brought back into line with the truth.  In this circumstance the truth is, this is a child who just made a mistake, she can learn from it and clean it up.  Coach her and encourage her.  Praise the Lord, I was able to overcome my emotional response and directed the child to clean up the mess, reminding her it was not big deal.  This is a little example, but I look forward to using this phrase to help me find the truth and heart of the matter in bigger issues that arise. 

As I have been thinking on how to apply this phrase to more issues I am finding that my reference point is often what leads me to sin.  When I have a situation arise where God is asking me to sacrifice my reference point is often selfishness instead of sacrificially serving as my Saviour modeled for me.  I also find that I struggle with the temptation to respond out of an ignorant reference point where I seek my own experiences to make sense of the things.  This is foolishness on my part.  There will be so many things that I won't understand.   I will need to forsake my reference point of thinking I must understand and trade it in for a reference point of trusting the Lord in all things.  It is truly exciting to think that such a simple few words put together could have such a profound impact on how I respond to the trials of life.  What a joy it is to have the Lord bless me with this bit of revelation this morning!  Perhaps it will encourage others to find their reference point in the face of temptation.

Dairy Free Menu Ideas

About a month ago we found out our little Gretta is pasteurized-dairy intolerant.  So I've been working on a dairy-free diet.  It is going much better than I expected.  I thought I would share some of the meals we've found that work for us.

Breakfast

• 7-grain hot cereal (Bob's Red Mill is what we like), I will add cocoa powder, some sweetener (either turbinado sugar or honey), and rice milk, mmmm...it tastes like hot chocolate
• oatmeal with blueberries
• granola and rice milk
• pancakes with sausage
• pancake sandwiches (pb & honey)
• omelets & toast (great way to sneak some vegies in with breakfast)
• poached egg on toast with avocado
• smoothies (spinach, frozen berries, oj, rice milk, spirulina, fish oil & ginger)

Lunches

• tuna in a whole wheat pita pocket with lettuce and cut up vegies
• cooked chicken strips on a whole wheat wrap with salad & homemade dressing, cut up vegies on the side
• soup (alphabet, minestrone or cream of vegie), toast and salad
• peanut butter banana panini
• bean burritos (pinto or black beans, salsa, taco seasoning & spinach) on a whole wheat wrap
• breakfast burritos (eggs and salsa in a whole wheat wrap)
• fried egg sandwiches
• scrambles eggs, cut up vegies and toast

Dinners

• Teriyaki stir fry and brown rice
• vegetable & meat curry over rice
• black beans & rice
• quiche
• pizza pasta (sauteed vegies, chicken sausage & spaghetti sauce over whole wheat penne & then baked)
• roast chicken & vegetables
• roast beef & vegetables
• stew
• chicken legs & baked potatoes w/ salad and cooked vegie
• tacos (minus the cheese and sour cream!)
• teriyaki salmon, roasted sweet potatoes, salad and cooked vegie
• fried rice
• venison burgers with roasted mushrooms, potatoes, salad and a vegie

Snacks

• dried fruit & nuts
• fruit
• chips & salsa
• pb & apples
• pita chips, vegetable and hummus
• vegie straws
• cashew nut clusters from Costco

My goal is to get as many nutrients in our family simply.  As our family grows, I am finding my time is less and less available to cook.  These are all pretty simple items that use many of the same ingredients so I don't have to stock a pantry and freezer with too many different items.  Here are some surprisingly great items that we've tried lately.

• Earth Balance butter substitute, it tastes just as good as butter to me!
• Spike seasoning, we've been flavoring our meat with this
• The Griddler by Cuisinart, we do burgers, salmon, sandwiches, pancakes and so much more on this
• Vegie Straws from Costco, these taste like chips without the bad stuff (they're still not great for us so there treats)
• Rice Milk - Pete and I have been enjoying coffee drinks in the morning and this takes the place of milk without a flavor concession
• Cashew Nut Clusters from Costco, these are so nummy!  A great treat if you like nuts & sweets
• Chicken sausage, there are so many different flavors, we like spicy for black beans, italian for pasta and garlic for our quiche.  Costco has some but, Trader Joe's has the greatest variety.
• Indian food.  Pete and I recently went to an Indian restaurant.  It was fabulous and had so many great flavors.  I have been trying to incorporate curry, turmeric and coconut milk into more of our cooking.  It's a fun way to liven up some of our dishes.
• Sprouted bread from Trader Joe's

Monotony

Life seems to be an endless cycle of monotony.  Each day I will get hungry and need to eat something then in about 4 hours I will be hungry again and need to eat and then get hungry again and need to eat.  I will sleep and then wake each day at about the same times for the rest of my life.  About every 24 hours I will require a shower.  I will pay bills once a month until I die.  Most of the things I spend my time doing are things that are cyclical and ever so monotonous!  Some of these things are enjoyable and others are a chore but, the truth is most of them are a part of my life I just need to come to content terms with them.  I caught myself saying to Pete tonight, "I have trained the children several times on how to take a shower, at what point have I trained enough that they remember to put the shower curtain in the shower!"  Training my children is so many times monotonous and it seems to be never ending.  What's a mama to do when these cycles begin to cause me to grow weary?  During these moments I realize I must, "vent vertically," as our Pastor, Mark Bowen would say.  I need to cry out to God to relieve my troubled heart of wrong attitudes and strengthen me, motivate me and comfort me.  The second thing that I need to do is find my head and follow it.  My head is my husband and God has blessed us married women with problem solvers.  When my perspective is skewed my husband is usually willing to help me adjust it and help me to fix my problems.  In the past when I've gone to my husband and spoken to him about feeling worn down from training he will often have me do something completely unexpected and what I would never think of.  The funny thing is that many times his ways, that seem so foreign to me, work!  One of the last things that I am reminded that I must do in this season of training and excess monotony is that I must stay encouraged.  Whether that be spending some time laughing with a girlfriend, reading an encouraging book, or simply refreshing with a fun movie.  Throwing something new, different, unscheduled and out of the ordinary into my routine often yields tremendous rewards.
Ahh....I feel so much better just remembering that my life is not completely monotonous and boring!   Maybe tomorrow we'll eat hot dogs for breakfast and play in the snow all day.

Burden vs. Load

Galations 6:2-4

Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.  3If you anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself.  4Each one should test his own actions.  Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, 5for each one should carry his own load.

I recently attended a conference at church that spoke about these verses.  I have often thought on these verses and what I can do help others in need but, I realize now I have been blind to the plain truth it contains.  When a burden comes into a persons life, this is something that cannot be dealt with alone.  The problem is larger than the person and we should instantly and sympathetically help them.  However there is a time when a person must carry their own responsibilities, their load.  A load could be defined as what we can handle on our own.  Generally speaking we are responsible and can provide for our families, parent our children and do everyday sort of things without calling in help. I realize there is some gray here, I am speaking to the clear areas.

This was a beautiful truth to really understand.  There is a freedom in knowing what is my responsibility as a Christ follower and what is not.  I find that it is so easy to entertain confusion when it comes to verses like these because the needs of others usually evoke an emotional response in me.  If I am not careful to evaluate the response in my heart and compare it to the truth of the Bible and the bottom line of the situation I can often embark with good intentions but wrong motive.  God has patiently been working on me in this area.  Clarity is still an elusive emotion and thought, but I find that if I stop, pray and seek out the word and wise counsel clarity is much easier to see in these issues that arise.

Lately I have been taking these verses a little closer to home.  Each day it seems there are numerous times I need to evaluate whether I am responding to a situation and treating it as a burden or a load.  When it comes to being a wife and mother I see that I often try and take on other people's loads and bug off what I don't want to deal with on others as a burden instead of dealing with it as my load.  There are times when I try so hard to control the actions of my husband or children and carry their load.  This is such and awkward and unnatural way to live with my family!  When I try and do my husbands job, make his decisions and put my will in his way God's law and order gets turned upside down and I drive my man away!  When I expect the children to act like adults and I try and carry their walk with the Lord and responsibilities for them the results are horrible! The child feels beat up because they can't please Mom and a they can't stand up under any pressure because I have been doing the work they should be doing to grow into responsible adults.

Our culture has this truth desperately backwards.  We have a new generation of men and women who can't work or manage their money because they've never carried their own load before.  We have parents and husbands and wives that make each other's lives miserable because they refuse to live in the order that God has ordained and to take personal responsibility.   We see people looking to unload their loads on anyone that they can and we see others never allowing someone to help them with their burdens.  It's heartbreaking to see that people are in so much pain because of their inability to stand up under the pressure of their own load.  It's just as disheartening to see people with unbearable burdens that no one else will help them with because their too bogged down by the messes they have themselves in.

These verses has been a tremendous reminder to me that I must carry the load God has planned for me.  The thing I find most ironic is that my load is so light when I am carrying the Load Jesus gives me instead of the one I think I should be carrying.  When I am living in what is meant for me, I have time to help with other's burdens.  In that I find much joy.  We were not created to live simply for ourselves but for the glory of our Father.  We bring so much glory to Him when we help others with their burdens. 

As women it is so easy to take on what is not ours to carry and burnout.  We must always be testing our actions to bring them into line with what God would have us do.  We are not to have lives where we crash and burn ever few days from the overwhelming pressure we put on ourselves.  We are meant to be victorious in Jesus' power!  Ladies let us embrace His truth, and His power and live in the peace of carrying what was only meant for us to carry!



Let Your Children Vote Too!

Today is election day.  At our house we talk about why it is so very important to vote and to elect people that share the same beliefs that we do.  To make this important day stand out we have done a couple of things you may want to do with your family.  The first is that we always bring our children to the poll with us.  We have them walk through the process with us.  The other thing we did today was conducted our own poll on what to have for dinner.  I hand wrote a ballot for each child.  On the ballot was appetizer, main dish, side and dessert options.  Under each one I wrote 3 options and then had the children vote for what they wanted to win the election.  It was great fun and a neat way to highlight our nations election process.

Beef Stew

This morning I got a pot of stew in the oven and the house smells so good. It would be great if I could bottle this scent! This is a great recipe for a day when you know you will be at home, it's blustery cold out and you want to knock the socks off your family with a savory meal. There are a couple of keys to a great stew, the first is that you dredge the meat in seasoned flour and brown it. The second is using a cast iron pan in a low-heat oven.

2# beef stew meat (you can cut up a chuck roast, steaks or other roast as well)

1/2c flour
1tsp. salt
1/4tsp pepper
1tsp. paprika
2T olive oil
2T butter
4c beef broth (I use 4c water + 1T beef base)
1c red wine
1-14oz can stewed or diced tomatoes(we hate chunks of tomatoes so I whip in the mini chopper)
1tsp dried thyme
1 bay leaf
1tsp garlic cloves, minced
fresh ground pepper
carrots, potatoes, onions and peas to preference, pealed & chopped in the same size pieces as the beef
salt

Heat the pot well, over med heat so you don't burn the oil and  butter. Cut up beef. Mix flour, salt, pepper and paprika in a plastic zip bag. Put meat in bag and coat well with flour mix. Place 1T butter and olive oil in pan, brown half the meat and remove to plate. Do with other half of oil, butter and meat. Remove all the meat. Add water, beef base, wine, tomatoes, thyme, bay leaf, garlic and fresh ground pepper, bring to boil (make sure to mix well and scrape the beautiful bits of crusty meat, butter and flour off the bottom). Once it has boiled add meat and stick in 250 degree oven, the longer the better! A couple of hours before you are ready to serve the meal add the vegetables, I like to taste the juice at this point to see if it needs any salt. Potatoes always taste better if salt is added when they cook, not after. Cook an additional couple of hours. Cornbread and a salad or coleslaw is a great accompaniment for this. The stew is terribly hot when you take it out of the oven, so it can stand to sit while you bake your cornbread.