Thursday, October 14, 2010

Overwhelmed and Tired

I confess I did not get up on time this morning, when I did finally get up I wasn't completely ready to great my little ones for the day. In all truth I still just want to crawl back in bed and take a nap. This is one of those days where I ask myself a hundred time, "how am I going to make it through!"

As a wife, disciple, mother and homeschool teacher the demands of the day can look terrifying at times. Most days are manageable and I can look at them with confidence, on the other days, I need something more than motivation. I would like to think a shot of espresso could do this, but that's not strong enough. The only thing that can get me through days like these is the Lord's power. Often times after evaluating where the exhaustion and feelings of being overwhelmed are coming from a realization strikes me, I have not been living in His power. On my own I tend to frantically rush from one to do item to the next and get frustrated when something comes between me and checking off things on my list. Is this the same list the Lord would have for me? Umm...probably not. His standards are not human standards.

A human believes she can get up at the crack of dawn; take a quick shower and end up looking radiant; cook wholesome delectable meals; have a spotless house; teach an exciting, educationally stimulating school day; manage the families extra activities with vibrancy and grace; serve each and every person she sees in need; and still have time left over to love on her man and keep him enthralled with her! Written here I know this sounds so stupid, but honestly in my power, of my standard this really is what I expect. His word places a high standard before us, but the truth is, it is not to be met by us in our power. In His strength, of His will and in His timing we can accomplish what He has before us. If I am willing to put aside these silly expectations and ask him to be in each part of my day so much more gets done. When I give Him the first place on my agenda and in my heart, he makes my day stretch to so much more than I could ever do alone! Yet, I find that I fall into my old ladies ways of trying to control it myself.

Having a quiet time to start the day is the first decision that leads to a more peace filled day. It isn't a cure all as I still can feel like there are a million things to fit into a little bit of time. It amazes me how God really does answer prayer. If I can remember to stop fretting and being anxious and get on my knees and let go, God answers and blesses that release. I laid all of the days worries and frustrations at the Lord's feet and he took care of it today. What a relief it was to look back at two completely different portions of the day. The beginning was stressful, frustrating and awkward in my power. After I prayed I got done way more than I could have imagined and felt re-energized. Thank You Lord, for showing me in such an obvious way so quickly that your plan is so much better than mine!!

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